WHAT? No Racing?!

Kimberly and I are planning to take the 2011 year off from racing our bicycles. It's shocking, I know, but there is a method to what appears to be madness.

Racing bikes is a lot of stress. (Talk to me when I'm toward the end of a "hard cycle", and you'll hear me snarl.) For me, cycling is much like a part-time job, and I'm already employed full time. With two children and two full-time jobs, Kimberly and I already tend to run pretty close to our limits. It wouldn't be so bad if it were only one of us that races, but we both do, and sometimes we end up with too many plates spinning on sticks for too long.

In addition to the family/work juggling, I have aging parents. We expect to see my mother moving from San Diego to assisted living in Denver soon, and it's going to take some work to integrate her into our lives, make sure she's comfortable, and so forth. My father has been fighting cancer for a few years, and it has always been touch and go.

We also want to take our kids on road trips during the summer. They are pretty good about our racing and training every summer for the last few years, but they are at an age where they can now tolerate road trips, but are not yet jaded teenagers. I, for one, have never seen Mount Rushmore, and I intend to make that happen. My job gives limited vacation time, and for once, I want to use it for something less selfish than racing. Well, for next year, at least.

This does not mean that we won't be training on our bikes. No, no, no. We both fully intend to return to racing in 2012, and at my advanced age, I cannot let myself get too far out of shape because it takes a distressing amount of time to get back on my game. I have worked too hard over the last several years to do anything rash like becoming a couch potato.

Sure, we will miss racing, but we are trying to set ourselves up for success in the long term. The luxury of Masters racing is that there will always be another year.

Vote For Me

I have decided that I should publish some of the agenda I intend to pursue after I'm elected emperor of the world. This list will be modified over time, as I get input from my prospective subjects and as I think of more stuff.

In no particular order:

• Establish rules for personal responsibility. This will include no-rescue zones in some wilderness areas (if you get lost or hurt, you rescue yourself or die), and absolution of responsibility for the driver that made you brain-dead when you were hit on a dark night with no lights while riding your bike with no brakes and wearing no helmet.

• Establish 8-day week (with no change to 365.25-day year). The eighth day is a weekend day. It might come in the middle of the work week, but I'm open to input from my subjects on that.

Thank you for your vote. Let's do an election soon.

Television

The last time I watched TV regularly, I only watched Star Trek: The Next Generation (not yet in rerun). But it was an old TV and had a bad electrical connection somewhere. It had something like a 14" screen.

But I had a belt that would just reach from where I sat. I would hit the TV with the belt when the connection got wonky. I finally realized that I was whipping my TV when it did not please me, so I tossed it in the dumpster rather than risk somehow corrupting myself.